So, a recent ex has made their way back into your mind or your actual world? If you still haven't gotten someone out of your system, seeing them again can be brutal. Can you add a happy ending to the situation for yourself? Is it possible to win someone back after a full year apart?

Be Confident and Cool

You really increase your chances of attracting an ex's attention if you are confident and unshaken simply by running into them again. If you act flustered and nervous, your ex knows that he/she has the upper hand.

Stick to Successes and Positive Subject Matters

When talking to your ex after a year, edit out all the bad things that might have occurred. This will give you confidence, as you hear yourself saying all the good things you have accomplished and experienced. It's not in good taste to spew negativity on anyone you have not seen in a while. Especially with an ex-lover, it is very undesirable to whine to them. Just keep it upbeat and positive.

Avoid Acting Too Eager

Even if you've been thinking about this person since the breakup, don't make it too easy for your ex. If you make yourself "off-limits" to some extent, this makes them want you more.

Plan a Not-So-Chance Meeting

If you haven't made contact with your ex and need a good excuse to run into them somewhere, there are many things you can try. Your goal should be to make the whole thing appear accidental. If there are mutual hangouts or friends that the two of you still share, by all means take advantage of them because sooner or later you're going to bump into him or her.

Stay out of your ex's actual neighborhood area. If you are caught at a hangout too close to his or her residence, it just makes you look creepy.

Invite Your Ex to Join You for a Casual Lunch

This is the big step once you've gotten in touch with your ex. Asking them to join you for lunch to catch up with one another is perfectly acceptable.

It is always a slick move to throw in some words such as "friends," and "platonic." This will make you both feel more at ease, as this first lunch meeting should be all about no pressure and no romance.

During the lunch, make sure to gauge their reactions to you. Does your ex seem happy to see you again, or not so much?

Be direct and say to your ex: "I'd really like to stay in touch and hangout more. How do you feel about that?"

If they do not want to see you again, at least you won't be hurt worse down the road and have your time wasted.

Start Over With a Friendship

Becoming a close friends with your ex is a natural progression if the two of you decide that you want to stay in communication with each other.

This friendship will not work, however, if either of of you (or both of you) still have bitter feelings about the breakup or the relationship itself.

If you can't tell if they still resent you for something(s), just be direct and ask instead of guessing. Tell your ex something along the lines of "It is really good to see you again. I'm over all the stuff that happened between us. Are you over it too?"

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Damian Phil